Why do I react like this?


Have you ever wondered why you react the way you do to life or people?   Most likely it’s not the situation at hand.

Personal experience

I started noticing myself responding to situations with reactions that were out of proportion to the situation at hand. That made me start asking questions then I realized that I had some broken areas in my heart and some wrong thinking in my mind.

So I’ve been getting my heart healed and my mind renewed through encountering God for myself and hearing him personally It’s been a process of simply asking him questions and listening. This type of experience is what is called SOZO, A Greek word for saved/healed/delivered.   

The healing and truth straight from God in the past few months, is changing my view of people and myself. 

I just realized one more this morning: the thing I love about SOZO, is that no one is telling me what God is saying to me. It’s God speaking directly to me, for me, about me, and I get it better hat way.  Maybe for you that’s not a big deal, but for me it is. You see, most of my life I had pastors, friends, mentors and leaders in the place only God should have in my life.  I had elevated leaders to a place they should never be allowed. I let their opinion be louder than the opinion of my Heavenly Father. My friends’ opinions were more important than Jesus’ opinion of me.  I had allowed the voices in and around my head to be stronger than the Holy Spirit inside me.

In the past I experienced major rejection and criticism and recently realized I was still living in fear of more rejection and criticism. 

While praying during a SOZO, I experienced Jesus holding my hand and him feeling and identifying with me through the pain of rejection and criticism. He understood. He also showed me who He is to me now, and I sensed and saw in a vision all those leaders, mentors, respected friends, who at one time held a high position of too much authority in my life, shrinking back down to their rightful place/role in my life in light of Jesus who is my Filter and Shield.  After this, I knew that everything any of those important people in my life say has to go through Jesus. He is my filter.

This brought me such peace.  His opinion of me is loving gentle and kind.  He loves me, he loves me, he loves me ….and he thinks I’m amazing in every way.  

To be completely honest, there are  still moments when I feel anxious or worried. The difference now is that I am more aware than I was before and I know that it is an opportunity for me to simply run to my Father and receive love from  Him in that area of fear (because anxiety and worry and stress are all just levels of fear).  When I receive love right in that moment for that area or fear or stress etc. God’s perfect love has been (over and over – even this week) banishing all that fear and anxiety and worry and replacing it with peace and truth and total acceptance.  

One of the coolest things is that I can share these experiences with my children so they can learn to recognize their heavenly father’s voice in that his voice be amplified in their lives as well.

So my friend.  What are you experiencing? Rejection…or anxiety, or fear of people’s opinions or fear of dying or any kind of fear, or depression or disappointment?  Jesus is just waiting for you to hear his good and encouraging and loving opinion of you.  (And I used to think that God himself was critical of me as a person. But you don’t have to be afraid of that either. He is so proud of us as his children. He really likes the way he created us – he likes everything about us. But seriously, you need to hear all these things for yourself straight from him. Then you would really believe it.) 

He really does take our bad beliefs and ideas and give us truth in order to stand tall and strong in our true identity.  

And one more thing: God is the one who defines me. No one else gets to do that. 😊 That also means I get to live without the pressure of what others think of me. 

Just talking about it I feel so so happy all over again.  😁 😊 😁

If you want to get in on this type of experience that’s really helped me, here’s a link to sign up for a SOZO and a description of what it is.  At times, this team has even used Skype to connect with people that are not local.

I make it a habit to go get a SOZO twice a year at the very least.  

As my friend, and spiritual Mother says: “Getting a SOZO is like taking your car in for a tuneup.” To some of you God is saying, “It’s time to pull your car into the garage.” – Marla Rowland 

I love you all!


If you’re still reading this, it’s because you are supposed to know THIS: 

It’s your time to get healed!  You are not much good to anyone if you are not healed.  This is a summer of health and wholeness.  By August you are going to be much, much healthier in body, soul, and spirit than you are right now.  

Let God begin to teach you how to:

Give yourself to the process.

Apply His truth to your life. 

Surround yourself with healthy whole people.  

Remove yourself from negative influences.

Get your life back.

Become whole.

Your family needs you to be whole. 

The world does, too! (That’s another post.) 


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